Lesson 103 - Lady Garden Horticulture - The VAGINA... who is she, really?

Understanding Your Lady Garden: From Anatomy to Myths - The Long Awaited Vagina Podcast Kickoff

Jump into the premiere episode of the Long Awaited Vagina Podcast where we dive headfirst into understanding our wonderful lady gardens! In this episode, we unravel the anatomy of the vagina and vulva, debunk some historical misconceptions, and explore why women have been so disconnected from their genital health. We shed light on Freud's outdated views on female orgasms, discuss the detailed anatomy of the vulva, and laugh about some nicknames along the way. Plus, we tackle the myth of the hymen and its impact on female sexuality. So, put on your headphones, ladies, because it's time for some real talk about our lady parts. Stay tuned for an enlightening, relatable, and slightly irreverent journey through our genital urinary system!

00:00 Introduction to the Long Awaited Vagina Podcast

01:05 Freud's Impact on Female Sexuality

07:22 Understanding the Vulva vs. Vagina

09:16 Anatomy of the Vulva

26:02 Inside the Female Reproductive System

36:19 Debunking the Hymen Myth

41:43 Conclusion and Upcoming Episodes

Thanks for listening! What topics do you want to delve into? Let us know at v@highteawithladyv.com

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Transcript

🎙️ Lady Gardeners Unite – The Long-Awaited Vagina Episode!

Hello, my beautiful Lady Garden holders!
 We are finally here, on the verge of the long-awaited Vagina Podcast – and I know you’ve been itching (pun absolutely intended) to finally learn what the heck our vagina really is.

But first… I have to share a little gem that landed in my inbox this week. It’s become our unofficial theme song here at Pussy HQ. Trust me—it’s too good not to share.

Welcome to Lesson 103: Lady Garden Horticulture – THE VAGINA.

I don’t think it needs much introduction—we all know of one, but do we actually know what it does? How she functions? What she’s made of? And why are we so damn disconnected from this integral part of our anatomy?

In this episode:

• Vaginas and their bits: The Genitourinary System – WTF!
• Why we give birth more than once (seriously, WHY?)
• A juicy rant about how medical and cultural messaging has completely messed us up.

🧠 The Freud Debacle: Who Do We Blame for the Orgasm Myth?

Let’s start this journey with none other than Sigmund bloody Freud. Yep—Freud. What does he have to do with your vagina? More than he should have.

You see, in the early 1900s, Freud decided to have an opinion about the female orgasm. He declared that clitoral orgasms were “infantile and immature” and that true sexual maturity could only be achieved via vaginal orgasm. If a woman couldn't climax this way, she was “frigid” or “not a real woman.”

Thanks to this genius insight, entire generations of women were made to feel broken. Cue: faking orgasms becoming the societal norm.

Oh—and get this—Freud’s own wife had three surgeries to move her clitoris closer to her vagina because he deemed hers too far away (more than 2.5cm). WTF?

So yeah, ladies—we've been gaslit by Freud and his fragile ego for over a century. And the worst part? This nonsense still lingers in society and medicine today.

🧬 Know Thyself: Vagina vs. Vulva – We’ve Been Saying It Wrong

Here’s the kicker: most of us, including me for years, have been calling our vulva a vagina. The vulva is the external part. The vagina is the internal canal.

So let’s break it down. And yes, if you've had coffee with me, been at the gym with me, or been at dinner with me (hello “flap” story!), you know we’re going deep into this.

Nicknames include:
 The VJJ, the hoo-ha, the fluffy, the peach, the taco, the vault, the fufu, the coochie, the beaver, the pink palace, the cupcake, the kitty, the muff, the honey pot, and my personal favourite—the Lady Garden.
No wonder we’re confused—we don’t even know what to call it.

And the word vagina? Comes from the Latin word for sword holder. Yep, it’s not even named for us—it’s named for what goes in it.

👩‍🏫 Anatomy Breakdown – Let’s Get (Re)Educated

THE VULVA:

Everything on the outside – including:

• Mons pubis: that fatty mound above your pubic bone (hello, horseback riders – you feel this one)
• Labia majora: the outer lips
• Labia minora: the inner lips, surrounding the clitoris
• Clitoral hood: protective skin fold over the clitoris
• Clitoris: with over 8,000–10,000 nerve endings, this is the main event for pleasure
• Vestibular bulbs: erectile tissue on either side of the vaginal opening
• Vulva vestibule: surrounds the urethral and vaginal openings
• Bartholin’s glands: produce vaginal lubrication (can get cysts—yay!)
• Skene’s glands: linked to female ejaculation and antimicrobial function
• Urethra: where urine exits the body (not for tampons, ladies!)

THE VAGINA:

Just the canal. That’s it.

• Internal, flexible tube between the vaginal opening and cervix
• Around 3 inches long, can expand (thankfully, hello childbirth)
• Tenting occurs when aroused—the vagina elongates and tilts upward

INSIDE JOB:

• Cervix: The gateway between vagina and uterus (small but mighty)
• Uterus: Where babies grow, expands up to 500x in pregnancy
• Fallopian tubes: Where the egg and sperm meet
• Fimbriae: Finger-like projections guiding eggs
• Ovaries: Hormone powerhouses producing estrogen, progesterone, testosterone

And the eggs? They are picky AF. They literally release chemicals to attract only the sperm they like, and repel the rest.
#SwipeLeft

💡 Fun Fact: The Hymen is Not a Virginity Alarm

Let’s debunk it:

• The hymen is just a remnant of vaginal development. Stretchy. Comes in different shapes and sizes. Can tear from tampons, bikes, horse riding, or not at all.
• It is NOT a measure of virginity.
• It’s part of the external genitalia, located at the vaginal entrance (yep, outside).
• The obsession with it is pure patriarchal garbage—and it’s time we bin it.

⚠️ “Normal” Ain’t Always Normal

You’ve been told:

• Peeing when sneezing? Normal.
• Heavier periods after birth? Normal.
• Pelvic heaviness? Normal.
   Nope. Nope. Nope.

Just because it's common doesn’t make it normal.
 Post-menopause:

• 1 in 3 women experience urinary incontinence
• 1 in 7 experience faecal incontinence

We’ve been conditioned to tolerate what we should be treated for. Let’s stop that now.

🔥 Next Week’s Tease: "Just Don’t Frickin’ Touch Me"

Get ready for an intimate convo with the epic Peta Romeo, host of The Ecology of Intimacy Podcast.
She’s a certified somatic sex, love, and relationship coach with a background in sexology and yoga—yes, vag yoga is a thing.

This is an episode you won’t want to miss.

🌸 Final Thoughts

Water your Lady Gardens, my friends—they are worth it.
 And remember:

Knowledge is power, power is wisdom, and a wise vagina is an informed vagina.